My dirty laundry

Sometimes when we are forced to hang out our dirty laundry for everyone to see, it can be a learning experience. I have had to show my dirty laundry to many people this week. The type of 'laundry' you try to hind in your house so that no one truly knows what is going on. Often times before you share your 'laundry' secretes someone already knows that something is just not quite right. However, once in awhile, you may find an extra hand that will help you with your chore. The extra pair of hands you find may come as a shock where you find them at. This week it was my in-laws. In-laws are a extension of family that you spend time with, but little is often known about these extra hands.  Too often husbands and wives look toward their in-laws as people we got because of a marriage. Hidden away beneath the hard shell that occupies these 'parents' might be some helping hands. I have learned that if I am starting to feel overwhelmed with the pile of dirty laundry in my house, I do have extra support. When it seems like the whole world is stomping and staining everything you have worked really hard for, then maybe it is time to look around you and realize what kind of support system you have. I do not have words for the help I have received recently, and I can only hope that one of them reads this and realizes that they are very special to me. Dirty laundry can take over your very existence and by not asking for help, you may be putting yourself in danger of being buried in it.

Angry all of the time

I have been angry all of the time for everything. I know that it is probarbly because I have not taken my meds in almost one month. Why? I know it is not a good practice. Let's see....my thought process .....I first thought with all of the cravings (see FB posts) I might be prego. I don't know if these was wishful thinking or the fact that all of my 'friends' on facebook were asking me. I knew that my meds were scary to take during a pregancy so I stopped them. I should had taken a test before that decision, but like I said I think I was wishful thinking. Hubby and I have had the conversation about having another one for quite awhile. I want to, he doest not..you get the point. Then my thirst and going to the bathroom a lot. I actually had an accident overnight in my bed. That has not happen since I was a child. So then I thought maybe diabetes. I was going to return to taking my meds after realizing that the chances of me be prego were pretty slim. (Mirena)

However, I knew that if I were to get back on them the headaches would start and I would have side effects from going back on them. So I stayed off. Now it has been four weeks and I am surprised my whole family has not walked out on me.

I am MAD at everything. The fact that my husband is breathing my air is enough to spat off a hour of dicussion, and don't get me started if he actually says ANYTHING. Then it is the kids, house, work, writing, blogs, and etc.....EVERYTHING IS JUST PISSING ME OFF!!!

My Thoughts

It has been awhile since I posted something here. I have been really busy with going back to work and trying to figure out the bill situation. My stress coping skills have been tested to the max. I wish I could remember everything my therapist taught me. Oh by the way, while I am trying to relax, there are things (besides bills ) that need to get done. How about the laundry, cleaning, mowing and this is just to name a few. Not to mention running Adam to PT. Uggggh! I need a break from life.This all seems to suck!

My first blog

Why am I blogging? It could be that I am a parent of a high-functioning disabled child, parenting through various mental illnesses or because I want to be a published author someday. All of these are reasons why I started my blog. They are presented their own set of problems. I was told to pick a niche, but I think they have all been done. It is also hard for me to keep up with all of the projects I have started. If you take a good look at my house you can tell that my depression sometimes cripples me from doing anything I start. My house is a mess, I am continuing stepping over trash. This is just because I am too depressed or overwhelmed to start the cleaning process. My son has ADHD, Asperger's (unoffical diagnosis as of late), physical limitations (two surgeries on his ankle joints), and impluse control issues. I suffer from depression, anxiety and conversion disorder. I have started to write articles for Associated Content. I have always wanted to be a writer. However, I (once again) can not seem to finish anything I start. I have now developed a personal goal of having something published, or at least queries sent to agents, by the time I am thirty years old. I am currently twenty seven. We will see what happens.